The Police Commissioner

It is May 6th 2021, a day of elections. Most of the parishes lie uncontested (except the neighbouring village of Pewsey which has 30 candidates! Democracy!) due to their being less people willing to be councillors (me one of them) than seats.

There’s also the district and the police commissioner. The latter was last on my list of importance; my first concern was finding out who was standing for Wiltshire County. That is, until my other half said that Mike Rees, a former copper, was standing as an independent and, not only that, wanted to reopen the case into other potential victims of Christopher Halliwell.

Halliwell is the killer of Becky Godden-Edwards and Sian O’Callaghan. He was caught simply because he mistook his final victim, Sian, for a prostitute. Sian, however, was a woman with a regular routine and a boyfriend and was missed straightaway after she didn’t return after a night out in her home town of Swindon. A decent bit of policing led by DS Steve Fulcher caught Halliwell and a bit of rule breaking by the DS and an out-of-oath confession led to Becky who’d been missing for eight years.

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Another week another fallen hero

I first knew Noel Clarke from the first series of the reincarnated (regenerated?) Doctor Who. Since then Noel has produced and acted in much lauded films and has become a bit of a Brit made good.

But, yesterday, turns out he’s Brit made bad. Twenty or so women (such as Jing Lusi, pictured) have come out in a national newspaper detailing their not so great experiences with him ranging from bullying to straight up sexual harassment.

I’m freshly raw from the revelations that my director/writing hero, Joss Whedon (him of Buffy the Vampire Slayer) acts like a bully on set, not to mention all those caught out by Operation Yewtree, and Johnny Depp. The more I think, the more I remember.

Is it misogyny? Doesn’t misogyny mean hatred of women? Looking it up…”dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women” (Wikipedia): These don’t really fit. The #MeToo-ishness of Noel Clarke could be someone who is obsessed by women, albeit a massively fucked up version of love. Someone who’s desperate to be noticed by them, possess them, touch them. I can just see that in his mind he is worshipping them. There’s a sad lack of esteem running through this story. There’s a beautiful girl he must have or he will be worthless. He doesn’t have the confidence to woo her in a healthy way that’s fun for both: there’s too much at stake to risk rejection. So he must ensure it by a thrilling exercise of power.

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Yvonne – murdered over chips?

Reading the results of a court case this week, I was saddened (again) by how far we still have to come in equality between the sexes.

Yvonne McCann was strangled by her husband in 2020, and her body cut up and disposed of in a skip.

Yvonne McCann

This in itself is dreadful but you can see the root of this in the reporting itself, in the way the courtcase panned out – a line from this to the Yvonne’s murder and of all the other women killed each year.

Some history first. I grew up in Westbury, Wiltshire, in the 70s and 80s. Around 1986, this ‘sleepy’ market town with a couple of schools, a park, a railway station, a few shops, one Chinese takeaway and chipshop, one supermarket and an industrial estate-based nightclub, overlooked by a white horse on the scarp slope of Salisbury Plan, became the murder capital of Britain.

First it began with a teenage friend of mine from church, in my O Level year. Her mother, Jeanne Sutcliffe and Heidi, her baby sister, was killed at their home by an apparently jealous female teacher, a collegue of her father’s (the police ‘knew’ it was a woman because the murder scene had been cleaned and tidied up…)

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Deep Space Nine and the beauty of sci-fi

It’s been twenty-four years since Star Trek: Deep Space Nine was first aired (yikes!) and probably twenty years since I watched it. I loved that show, my favourite Star Trek series, but – as the days long before iPlayer, Netflix, etc. – I only had one shot to watch each episode so many were missed.

Finally, on Netflix, there’s the whole glorious seven series. Would it hold up? I’d already attempted to watch other Star Treks which I’d remembered enjoying (bits of) but Voyager didn’t grab me and Enterprise was too American gung ho and post 9-11 (urgh).

Well, yes it has. I’m thoroughly enjoying it. The characters are well-remembered old friends, rounded, fun, consistent, with light and dark sides. It’s got the right amount of humour. Each episode is carefully constructed and draws on and adds to the Star Trek universe. The Federation is a wonderful futuristic ideal but dramatic tension is ably provided by the Bajorans, Cardassians, Dominion as well as old favourites the Klingons and Romulans. And let’s not forget the Ferengi. Now I am as unhappy with capitalism and sexism as the next socialist leftie, but I do love profit-loving, sexist, Ferengi DS9 bar owner Quark and his speciesmen. There’s something honest and straightforward about his…dishonesty. Perhaps he’s mostly mischievous and loyal to the principles of his society. Perhaps because when push comes to shove he’ll do the right thing. Perhaps because he’s acted brilliantly by Armin Shimerman.

But really the reason I’m writing this piece is not (just) to declare my love for a well-written, well-executed TV story, but to observe how good Sci-fi is as an opportunity to delve into current values and explore new ones. Just look at the original Star Trek. The pilot had a woman commander – aired in the 1960s! – and the prime time TV series had a black woman, a Russian and a Japanese as part of the senior crew/main cast – in the 1960s! – and the first TV interracial kiss – in the 1960s! Assassinated black activist Martin Luther King was a huge fan and convinced black actress Nichelle Nichols – who played Lieutenant Uhura – to stay on the show:

“Don’t you understand what this man [Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry] has achieved? For the first time on television, we will be seen as we should be seen every day, as intelligent, quality, beautiful people who can sing and dance, yes, but who can go into space, who can be lawyers and teachers, who can be professors — who are in this day, yet you don’t see it on television until now,’


That quote literally brings tears to my eyes. (For more on this, read this Washington Post article.)

This is why I love DS9 and am very disappointed in the backwards, toe-the-line, entertainment-lite Enterprise of the early noughties.

But in spite of its convincing stories – of the difficulties of forging peace between Bajor and Cardassia – its former Nazi-like oppressor; its pitch-perfect treatment of the co-existence of science and religion; its black commanding officer and women second in command and science officer, the Gamma Quadrant matriarchal society where men can ‘be useful but mostly just want to fight’; the woman Cardassian scientist who says that men are too emotional to be good engineers; security officer Odo calling for the attention of ‘Ladies, Gentlemen and Androgynous people’; hurrah! Men and women wear the same uniform, no short skirts for girls – its a reminder of where we were in the 1990s and what we still struggle with to this day.

Up to where I am now (end of series three), there are no gay relationships. Women have perfect made up. There’s a range of ages of actors but the age of main cast actresses (at the start of the show) finishes at mid-thirties. Irishman engineering Chef O’Brien is the only (happily) married man of the show, to a Japanese woman. Keiko is a botanist who gave up her career to follow him to DS9, whereupon she starts a school. But who always puts the replicated food on the table? Who puts their young sick child to bed even though she’s just spent hours travelling to DS9 from Bajor? It’s also assumed (uncontested) by the Chef that she will take five-year-old Molly with her on her botanist expedition into the unexplored wilds, even though it would be more logical for Molly to stay with her other parent safely on the space station.

SPOILERS *While looking up Keiko’s nationality, I noticed on Wikipedia that in a later series they covered up actress Nana Visitor’s (Major Kira) real-life pregnancy by transplanting Keiko’s foetus from her second pregnancy into Major Kira. Now perhaps they didn’t have enough time to adjust their time lines and story arcs. Or perhaps incorporating Nana’s impending motherhood into an out-of-wedlock/permanent relationship was still too much for prime time.*

Men are still the ones to make the sacrifices and women are the ones who baulk at it – O’Brien refuses to go with his wife and child when it looks like Cardassians may storm DS9 – ‘I can’t let the Cardies take the station!’ he says. ‘Let them!’ Keiko says. Doctor Bashir doesn’t think a wife and family are compatible with life in Starfleet. SPOILERS* Bajoran spiritual/statesman Vedek Bareil chooses the Bajoran peace treaty over his life, a life with his lover Major Kira. Lieutenant Dax – a female trill with many conjoined lifetimes – impulsively attempts eternity with a non-corporeal male entity and sacrifice her current happy life and career, while he ultimately feels a greater obligation to his community. And, of course, why should a non-corporeal entity be consistently male?*

Commander Sisko’s teenage son Jake and his best friend Nog, a Ferengi, argue over a double date. Jake (and the dates) are outraged when Nog tells them to be quiet and look beautiful and to cut up Nog’s food, while Nog doesn’t understand why Jake wants to chat with the girls. Jake doesn’t think they can stay friends – perhaps his dad was right, Ferengis and humans are too different to be friends. Nog and Jake make it up by promising to remember they have different values. Yes, cultural acceptance is good, but perhaps Jake could have explained how Nog could have more fun with his date by treating them as equal. After all, Nog is influenced enough by Starfleet and its values by *SPOILER* becoming the first Ferengi to apply to Starfleet Academy.

So now I’m enjoying Star Trek: Discovery, set before Captain Kirk and well over one hundred years before DS9. We follow Michael Burnham – a black woman adopted and brought up on Vulcan, reason for male name yet to be resolved (but who cares she has a ‘male’ name, right?) – she’s principled and considered Starfleet’s worst war criminal for following those principles, she has a non-skinny white woman friend (not ‘fat’, just not size zero) with an honest and quirky personality. The white male science officer is in a relationship with the black male doctor. There are lots of things to love about this. I hope there’s more to come. And not just that Michael ends up happily married, daily serving her white husband replicated food, as well as saving the Federation from the Klingons.

I’ll leave you with the words from a 2016 speech to the UK parliament by black actor and Londoner Idris Elba,

“I’m not here to talk about black people. I’m here to talk about diversity. Diversity in the modern world is more than just skin color — it’s gender, age, disability, sexual orientation, social background, and – most important of all, as far as I’m concerned — diversity of thought. Because if you have genuine diversity of thought among people making TV & film, then you won’t accidentally shut out any of the groups I just mentioned. Anyway, on the whole, I don’t think of myself as just a ‘black actor’. I’m an actor, not a number. Just like anyone else.

Talking of brains…

Imagine there’s a huge multinational organisation that sells online, mostly books, but electrical too and much more.

Imagine they have a terrible record for treating their workers with respect.

Imagine, if you will, they become fed up with those pesky campaigns, calling on them to attend more to their workers needs.

Someone at board level has a bright idea. He’s a firm believer in dualism and in particular, Descartes. He suggests they try an orthodox solution. Devise a chemical reagent to disperse in the water supply to control the pineal gland.

“My view is that this gland,” said Descartes, “is the principal seat of the soul, and the place in which all our thoughts are formed.” Continue reading

Thinking is dead

Remember this front page from The Sun last week?

“This is the pig’s ear Ed made of a helpless bacon sarnie. In 48 hours he could be doing this to Britain.”

What has a bacon sandwich – even a helpless one – to say about a politician’s competence to govern a country?

This cover story merely showed a flair for a clever turn of phrase, a picture that would normally be deleted by a discerning photographer and perhaps a lack of hand eye coordination.
This is not information, not news and a planet away from thinking.

This is vituperation. Continue reading

I live in a world of promise

I live in a world of promise.

When I was hungry someone gave me food, and I promised something in return.
I made him a coat.
But, I said, it took me much longer to make your coat than it did for you to make my food.
So he promised me two days food.
I made another coat.
Two people wanted it. One offered me two days of food. The other offered me a plate.
I took the plate.
Hearing how warm, dry and happy my coat made these two people, three more people wanted my coat.
The first offered food. The second offered a plate. The third offered a chair and all the food he had.
I took his chair and his food. Continue reading

It’s crucial to prepare for the zombie apocalypse

This was the third talk I prepared for the Swindon Festival of Literature Think Slam, 2014, but never got to perform. I dedicate this to fellow zombie fan and philosopher, Sandrine Berges.

It’s crucial to prepare for the zombie apocalypse.

If we’re to believe the current fad in fiction, the zombie apocolypse is coming.

And so we should be ready for it.

Now before you shuffle in your seats and wonder when it was this turned into a Sci-Fi convention, I’m talking about what happens when the oil runs out, the electricity goes off and we’re immune to anti-biotics. Continue reading

Public benefit services should only to be run as not-for-profit

This was the second piece performed in the Swindon Festival of Literature Think Slam, 2014.

At the Think Slam two years ago, someone gave an interesting three minuter about how the welfare state should not be run by social enterprise.

I’m here to say that it should and so should other public benefit services.

In the last two years we’ve seen the NHS been virtually put up for sale and bought by the French. Schools have been run by businesses.

Public transport either slashed to extinction or priced beyond the ordinary wage. Letting agencies charge extortionate prices to renters before they even move into accommodation. Continue reading

Why we should tell five year olds about sex

A slightly abbreviated version of this was ‘performed’ at the Swindon Festival of Literature Think Slam 2014.

Modern society – especially our British and American societies – have a weird relationship with sex. Women who discreetly bare their breasts in public to feed an infant have been ostracised, as demonstrated by Holly McNish’s experience-inspired poem ‘Embarrassed’. Whereas page three of The Sun bearing young women’s breasts for sexual pleasure continues unabated. And news reports of pedophilia are run next to stories of female celebrities who have just turned sixteen and therefore suddenly sexually available. Continue reading